Photo by Michelle Miller

Light and dark
Black or white
Good and evil
The West likes dichotomy or seeing one versus the other.

The light is on or it is off.
Circuit closed or open. It cannot be in two states at once. Or can it?

Eastern thought embraces being both at once.
Dualism allows us to understand light as both a particle and a wave.
We are both good and evil.

When I let go of having to be one or the other, I feel more free to move and act. I can be both. I can aspire to be helpful while embracing the parts that are still learning.

Photo by Marc Noorman on Unsplash

going nowhere
broken down
dead in your tracks
will you ever move again?

yes, she whispers, teeth clenched
when it is time, i will move


I parked my old Honda next to my house when COVID hit in March. She didn't move again.
Limped along with my Grandmother's old car. Limping doesn't suit me. Does it suit anyone?

Got her working the other day. Filled with joy. Two friends reunited for shared adventures again.

Though sure I knew the end, I was wrong. About her and about me. The hope flame, nearly gone, won out.

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo

Resolving to make changes
And then sticking with them.

At the start of a new year, a new decade, and a new century, we may want to change some things.
Changes personally or collectively to make things better for ourselves and hopefully others.

It is easy to make promises to ourselves about how "everything will be different" this year or this decade or this century. We can come up with actionable plans for making those changes.
Then time passes.. Forgetfulness looms. Life happens and waylays our commitment.
We start to doubt that it is possible to make change or we merely forget the task we set for ourselves.

At times like these, I find it helpful to entrust my promise to another. To give my word to the change I will make today or tomorrow on behalf of a future that needs to be.  And to know that she will ask me if I did it.
Being on the hook.  Making a promise and sticking to it. Building trust day by day. Trust in myself.

Holding myself to account works for me.  Everyone is different.  What works for you?

If someone you know would benefit from hearing this, please pass it on.

Photo by Kenny Luo

Light the forge! Stoke the fire!

All great creations start with such an act of intention.

Once the fire is going, you must do something with it or waste it.

The metal is heating, how will you shape it?

By Aude - Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=41471674

Cheap is not always better.
A fan of being frugal, I seek a good deal.
I will buy generic brands of canned corn over well-known brands who pay to be well-known.

But in the race to the bottom, we can lose track of the sideways effects.
Choosing cheap chocolate, for example, has effects far from me.
It ripples to small farmers in underdeveloped countries growing cacao.

As privileged consumers in a wealthy country, we can make a difference with what we purchase.  We can make change by looking to sourcing ethics. Where did this squash come from? Or coffee or chocolate? Is this low price a fair price for the producer? Or did the middleman take most of the profit?

You get what you pay for and the ripple effects.  Ethical purchases sell a story of making a difference for people with little.

Photo by Sarah Kilian

"I get to make mistakes."

Words uttered by Jordi Roca, the world's top pastry chef, during a show highlighting his work on Netflix Chef's Table series. He spent years not fitting in with his family, a family of restauranteurs. He did things differently, backwards in fact.  He coasted through his hand-out job working in his brothers' Michelin star restaurant, until he found pastry.  And it sparked. His backward-viewing became his secret weapon in creating dishes no one had ever thought of. Genius.  And his large nose with its ability to discern subtle aromas fuels his creative fire. His weaknesses became his strengths.

I watch this over and over. It inspires me. He is apprentice-trained only, like me. In my opinion, the best way to learn. And his attitude about making mistakes sets me free. If I can arrive at the joy of making mistakes, I feel I could do anything.  The world is there ready for me to experiment with. It is only by trying and failing over and over and over that new discoveries are made and new creations or innovations are born.

Where do you want to start making your mistakes?

 Photo by Jeremy Thomas on Unsplash

Most people want to be right. And no one wants to be wrong.

We decide to do things the way we do them because it seems right to do so.

In the tug of war between ego (being attached to being right) and humility (not attached to it), one must face thoughts about self.  What does it mean about me if I am not right?

Our inner dialogue expresses itself with our actions in the world. We seek approval, to fit into our social group, and to do what we believe is right.  All admirable and understandable.

And sometimes we can cross over to thinking our way is the only way. That we are right and others are wrong. These thoughts are the basis of war and violence. Yet also understandable.  When we see the need for change in the world, how can we frame the need for change without making everyone invested in the status quo (or things as they are now) wrong?

Humility paves the path forward.  It leaves no trail of bodies made wrong by their choices, values, or the color of their skin. To bow low to something other than yourself.  Humbling oneself before God perhaps. Understanding that you are merely a speck on the vast Earth, and it is just a speck in the Milky Way galaxy, which is just a speck in the cosmos.  Allow for the possibility that you are wrong.  It will set you free.

Asking for help is generous.
Uncomfortable possibly for the strong, independent types.
No one wants to be dependent on others...
And yet we all are.....; maybe not dependent but interdependent.

We are natural helpers.  It's built into our genetic code.  It had to be to survive a world of dangerous predators. Most of us love to help.

Big achievements, like sending a man to the moon, cannot be done alone. President Kennedy asked all Americans to help.  He created a shared dream. Dr. Martin Luther King did the same.  He asked for help in making real his vision of a just society.

Disliking asking for help myself, I see the need to step out of my comfort zone.  To build something together with you. I am creating movement videos for the next phase of my business and I would love some help getting feedback on what I have created so far. If you are willing to be in my first adopter test groups, please email me at [email protected]

Photo by Shawn Appel on Unsplash
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Most changes happen slowly, bit by bit, at a glacial pace.
But sometimes everything changes in an instant, for the better or worse.

Driving along in your car with all well and good and then you aren't well and good.
A loved one who has shared your life most of your life passes.
One minute things were as they have mostly always been, and then it is as if you plunged into an alternate universe.

But the best, my favorite, are the moments that change you in a blink for the better.  You become a wife or a husband. Or a mother or a father. 

Or a grandmother, as I just did last night. I didn't think it would change me so much.  I feel different. Filled with joy and overflowing love, and aware of the huge role my grandparents had in my raising. May I be as good at it as they.

HT Jeremiah and Ellie

Photo by Jodi Noordmans

Blessed by much good counsel in my life.
Helping me see a path I might have missed.

Pointing out options hidden or impediments buried within that keep me from fulfilling my potential. Suggesting ways to move forward. Helping me see the stories that weren't working for me.  Without their compassion and generosity, their gift, I could not live the life I now live. 

Everyone teaches in their own way.  Each interaction changes me.  I imagine I change others also.

Appearances deceive. 
Even disaster can be a great teacher.  It clears the way forward by forcing our hand.